


We're Dancing in a World Alone (We're All Alone)

by thelilnan



Series: You're the Only Friend I Need [1]
Category: Catfish: The TV Show
Genre: Accidental Drug Use, Awkwardness, Clubbing, Drug Use, Drugged Sex, First Time, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-20
Updated: 2014-06-20
Packaged: 2018-02-05 10:50:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1815886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelilnan/pseuds/thelilnan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set during S03E03: Antoinette and Albert.</p><p>Max and Nev go out to a club with the young Catfish and Catfishee only to have things go a little... wrong. Does this drink taste funny to you?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

So T-Lights turned out to be genuine and he and Antoinette seemed to be hitting it off. Who would’ve guessed a catfish would’ve turned out so amicably, especially with details like “up incoming rapper” and “Instagram famous?” In any case, Nev, Max, and the crew got another full day in Florida while the two stars got to know each other, though nothing too TV-worthy was expected to happen. Most of the two’s day together was just talking, walking, shopping. Normal, twenty-somethings dating things. Not great television.

Eventually their show-runner called it a wrap and freed Nev and Max to frolic around central coastal Florida. They did much the same as Antoinette and T-Lights, though with much more goofy stupidity; more than usual, in fact, seeing as their only cameraman now was Max. Now they could be as silly as they wanted without that naturally occurring self-consciousness whenever a real crew follows them. It’s been years for both of them to get used to this constant audience, and it’s been exhausting to learn how to stay “on” all the time. But no matter how much you’re in front of a camera, you never really let go of that self-awareness. _Everyone will see_.

But not now. They have the whole evening in front of them to order take-out and chill in their room, when Antoinette texts them.

«What r u guys up 2?»

Nev texts back quickly, lying on his back on Max’s bed, «Nothing. Chilling. You?»

«T takin me 2 a club. U should come! xo»

Nev looks up at his friend beside him, zoned out playing 2048 on his phone.

“Maxie, you wanna hit the club tonight?”

Max laughs and glances before resuming his non-time-based game with all the urgency of a time limit pressing upon him, “Antoinette say that?”

“I added the Maxie, but yeah. You up?”

There’s a pause and a long inhale and longer sigh before Max replies, “Sure.”

\--

They’re not club people. They don’t own clubbing clothes. They still try to do better than the night before and dress a little nicer. Antoinette meets them outside. T-Lights and a couple of his bandmates are with her; some unknown member is driving. Max feels the itch to hold a camera, document this night, but settles for gripping his phone.

“Oh my god, you guys are adorable,” Antoinette coos. Nev laughs and agrees, fluffing his own hair shyly.

“We don’t really go to clubs.”

It’s obvious they don’t fit in with the Millennials. Everyone is dressed like they want to get trashed and Antoinette looks like a page out of a glamor magazine. She’s gorgeous; long legs, tan skin, beautifully perky and bright. The boys in the car look like they bought their clothes on their parents’ credit cards; designer shirts and shoes, flat bill hats and thick-banded watches. Max and Nev are frumpy by comparison, looking more fit to find a small group in the park, talk about stupid shit and laugh loudly, than to drink and dance with this much younger crowd. But Nev is optimistic and hurries Max into the car, eager to discover yet another side of life.

Conversation doesn’t count for much in the car. Nev is all wide smiles and interest while Max fiddles with his phone, half-listening. He plays Flappy Bird while waiting to get to the club. And it’s not even that he’s asocial or has some sort of cultivated cynicism for these kids almost a decade younger than him. He loves people, same as Nev, but at 30, he’s not that guy anymore. Neither is Nev but there’s no accounting for enthusiasm. So he’ll dance and have a bit to drink and try to enjoy himself when the alternative would’ve just been another night watching stupid cable movies and dicking around with his best friend. Really, a change of pace isn’t a bad idea.

“Come on, bunny,” Nev pulls him out of the car and into a ridiculously long line they would’ve had to stand in if not for the Twenties’ local pull. They rush to the head of the line and Nev and Max feel awful about it, but then the guards give them this look. They expected that. Nev smiles uncharmingly big and tries to look cool and Max is just behind him, mortified that they’re even doing this. But the group vouches for them and they’re let in. Max silently wishes they’d just gone in without them. They have enough cash for a cab back to the hotel. It would’ve been fine.

But then they’re inside and the music is as loud as humanly possibly and the air is thick with haze and drunk kids trying to have a good time. Almost immediately, Antoinette and her boys disappear. She probably screamed she’d meet up with them soon but they never heard it. Whatever. Max drags Nev to a quieter corner and has to shout his conversation.

“How long are we staying??”

Nev shrugs and finally allows himself to look distressed. With Max and only Max, he can stop being so perky and optimistic and Max finds comfort in that. Of course, the positivity isn’t an act; Nev genuinely believes in happy endings but being with Max allows him to be realistic as well. Nev allows Max to believe in sunshine and rainbows. It’s a good balance. Together, they are simultaneously miserable and hopeful for their evening.

“I’m gonna get a drink,” Max shouts. Nev asks for a beer.

The bar is crowded to all shit and since he’s not a rich boy flashing his dad’s credit card and not a girl working her angles to get a freebie, Max is more or less out of luck. It’s a scramble to order drinks and push to the front of the mob and Max nearly screams more than once. The music is too loud, the countertop is wet, and he wants to just start swinging his fists to see who he can clear out.

He shouts for two beers, flashing two fingers. He can’t tell if the bar tender sees or hears him but he waves a couple of bucks and sees two beers in reaching distance. The cups are translucent plastic in neon colors. Bottles are apparently “uncool” now or whatever bullshit the club scene wants to push. Whatever. Max throws his money down and takes the beers. Fuck if they weren’t meant for him before; they’re his now.

When he finally reaches Nev, his friend is occupied with what looks like–and is—Max’s phone. 2048, that siren bitch. Max exchanges the beer for his phone, shooting Nev a look. Nev is unapologetic and drinks his beer and the two decide to people-watch until Antoinette finally finds them to take them home. It could take a while, so they post up their corner and drink.

\--

Max feels weird. Hyped up and buzzing and distracted. The music has drowned out into a pleasant thumping and Nev is beside him, open-mouthed grinning, and everything feels great. Weird but great. Like, amazing. Better than he’s ever felt and there are lights and colors and love everywhere. He doesn’t think it’s the alcohol. When he waves his hand he sees tracer lights following its path. Everything has an aura in the neon-streaked dark of the club. He can see the bass thumping through the speakers, feel it through his feet to his brain. Max can’t breathe.

Nev is in his ear and shouting about wanting to dance. Max agrees before he really processes the idea, grabbing the front of Nev’s shirt, and the two fumble into the throng of bodies moving in the center of the room. They soon get lost in the fray, bouncing against each other and laughing and watching the lights and colors play over each other’s faces. Max is deliriously happy. Part of him is bugged because he’s only had one beer. He shouldn’t be feeling anything. He’s also enchanted by the way Nev moves and before long, he doesn’t care about anything. He grabs Nev and holds him close and the two bounce and laugh and hang onto each other in the enormous crowd.

But then suddenly the crowd doesn’t seem so enormous. Suddenly it feels like just them, like it’s them and their breathing and Nev’s laughter that Max can somehow hear now, clear as day, and Max wants to melt through the floor. Nev’s arms are around his shoulders and he’s falling on Max, laughing and bouncing and Max is going to die. He can feel it. His heart is pounding and everything’s too hot.

“I’m having a stroke!” Max calls out. Nev laughs and pulls him even closer. A hand finds its way into his hair. Max groans. Everything is hot. He hides his face in Nev’s neck and bounces to the rhythm he feels flowing up through the both of them. Everything is starting to blur together.

Except Nev.

Nev is bright and outlined by rainbows and his laugh is louder than the thrumming music in the club. Max is watching him through unfocused eyes and entranced by every beautiful second. The world seems to be jittering, clipping through frames, 5, 10 seconds ahead, and suddenly his hands are in Nev’s hair and they’re kissing. They’re _kissing_.

Fuck, everything is hot. Max whines into Nev’s mouth and starts stumbling backwards, colliding with younger ravers, trying to get the hell out of dodge. Nev follows him, mouth and hands desperate to keep him close, and Max leads him out into a quieter hallway where he can try to focus up and think.

Nev is still all over him when he’s pushed against the wall and Max can’t tell if that means it was his idea to initiate this or what. But Nev’s mouthing and sucking kisses into his neck and has both hands down the back of Max’s pants and Max cannot breathe. He shoves his hands back into Nev’s hair and lets out a pathetic, mewling whine. Others in the dim hallway are similarly trashed and in compromising positions but the camaraderie is of little consolation. Max still can’t breathe. Nev is still sucking on his throat. Everything is bright.

Max’s hips jerk forward, meeting Nev’s thigh, and it’s only a second more before they reconfigure their legs and start grinding on each other with purpose. Max gasps against Nev’s cheek. Before he can stop himself, he’s actually undressing Nev, right there in the hallway, where anyone can see. Nev keeps kissing over his face, not keen on stopping him. It’s just when Max shoves a hand down the front of Nev’s briefs that Antoinette finds them.

“You guys!”

Max looks at her, terrified, but both hands refuse to move. Nev sputters some unintelligible, laugh-like noise. She’s furious and hysterical, caught between laughter and outrage as much as Max is trapped between Nev and the wall. Suddenly the world starts skipping and clipping forward again. He’s being yelled at. They’re in the car. They’re dumped at their hotel. They’re riding the elevator up and his pinkie finger is hooked with Nev’s.

“Do you have my phone?”

Nev says he does. He also has the hotel key.

They avoid making too much noise while getting to their room but it’s mostly because they don’t know how loud anything is anymore. Whispers sound like yells Shouts sound like mumbles. Nev manages to get both of them to the door in under 10 minutes but even that’s a minor miracle. Max nosedives in through the door and straight into his bed by some grace of god. The soft comforter feels amazing, especially when he presses his groin into it. Max groans and embarrassingly humps the edge of his bed for a moment before Nev pulls him away by the belt loops and into his lap on the other bed. From there, they kiss messily, teeth colliding, clothes being torn off, and Max feels so good he might start laughing. He does, and Nev joins him.

“We’re gonna have sex,” Nev stage whispers, running curious hands up Max’s naked torso. Max is in his lap, grinding erratically, flowing with the feeling rather than the technique. And it feels incredible.

“Yeah,” Max eventually agrees and the two fall over themselves, rolling around in the bed and kissing and putting their hands wherever they can. They’re down to their boxer briefs now and Nev is between Max’s legs, pressing their groins together and bumping his chin against Max’s cheek. Max cries out, half-moan and half-shouting from pain, but then it’s entirely pleasure. Nev is thrusting smoothly, kissing his neck, and Max could cry. It feels amazing.

“I kind of want to suck your dick,” Max confesses breathlessly. Nev stops thrusting and grins a hazy, sweaty, crooked grin.

“Kind of?”

“Really! I really want to.”

“That’s more like it,” Nev whispers and kisses him deeply with too much tongue. A hand is between his legs, petting his inner thigh, and Max shivers at Nev’s teasing almost-touch. It’s too much and it’s not even real yet. Max is sure he’s going to die before Nev lays a hand on him.

“I want–” Max chokes and wails quietly. Nev’s hands are on his ass, curious fingers trying to feel too much through the layer of cotton that still clings to him. Max bucks, overloaded on pleasure, feeling a need he’d only flirted with before in his college years.

“Whatchya want, Maxie?” Nev teases and Max only sees cartoon hearts around Nev’s head and in his eyes, in his smile, in his every movement and touch. Max chokes; it’s beautiful.

Suddenly, before Max can think about how beautiful he looks or why a single cup of _beer_ is making him see these things,Nev is between his thighs, leaving tiny kisses everywhere but where he needs it most. Max is anguished, arching against the bed, grabbing the sheets and shouting any sound he can make. Nev doesn’t stop teasing for a second.

“I’m gonna come!” Max wails sharply, writhing like some helpless, wanton thing. Nev grins against his thigh.

“No you’re not.”

“Fuck you, yes I am!”

“Then I’ll have to make you come again later, too.”

Max shudders and it’s nearly over. But Nev turns out to be right and Max doesn’t come. He’s instead turned onto his stomach and Nev is on his back, kissing his shoulders, his neck, and then Max’s lips. It’s good. It’s warm, and loving, and safe. Max moans into his mouth, hand petting an arm braced near his shoulder, and licks into Nev’s mouth. Nev presses his hips to the curve of Max’s ass and grinds teasingly, letting Max know exactly what he’d like to do. Again, that long-hidden need surges inside of him and Max arches his hips back, agreeing to the proposition.

“Are you gonna fuck me?” Max slurs badly but Nev doesn’t seem to mind.

“I’m gonna wreck you, camera boy.”

“Please,” Max sighs and pulls his knees up under himself, presenting his ass in the sluttiest way he knows how. Nev appreciates the motion and indicates this with a hard thrust that sends Max lurching forward. It’s thrilling.

“I’ve got some lube in my bag,” he breathes against Nev’s mouth. Then Nev is gone and stumbling towards that bag and crashing into the TV stand. Max lurches up to see if he’s okay and falls off the bed.

“Christ.”

“Fuck.”

They get the lube.

Unfortunately, between their combined four hands being as clumsy as they are, lubricant is more effort than it’s worth. Most of it goes on their hands and Max’s thighs before Nev can get the slippery bottle under control. Max lies back, legs pulled up, and watches Nev carefully. His head is swimming by the time Nev gets in between his legs and pushes a finger inside.

He gasps, grabbing both Nev’s arm and the pillow under his head, and holds on tight while Nev does his best to stretch him. Max asks for Nev to kiss him while he pushes in another finger and Nev agrees, kissing him slowly and deeply until Max can’t breathe, gasping his name and rolling his hips.

“You should ride me,” Nev bites the suggestion into Max’s cheek. He groans and nods.

“Y-eah...!”

“And we should record it.”

“Oh my God...”

Nev huffs and kisses more marks into his neck, “It’ll be our own segment.”

“They throw it into the post-commercial Bump,” Max jokes and they both start laughing. The Bumps had always been ill-timed, for whatever reason. MTV insisted on throwing in their Free Day antics in wherever they would be at the most dramatic point in the Catfish encounters to “lighten the mood.” Can’t scare away those fragile teens and twenty-somethings. But imagining it now, between Nev’s talking to T-Lights and his and Antoinette’s day together, a solid two minutes of Max Joseph riding Nev Schulman’s dick, out of his mind and loving every second of it. It’s hysterical and Max can’t stop laughing, even as Nev leaves him to grab the handheld.

“Budge up, cowboy,” Nev nudges him up and climbs in the bed, then nudges him again so he straddles his hips. Max is still giggling, hoping their porno makes the cut. It takes a combined effort to align things and get Max on track but once he gets it, he sinks down easily and it’s a long, quiet moment while both men adjust to it. Max is bowed over, panting heavily, and Nev is clenching his hands on both Max’s hip and the handheld camera. He’s filming. This is real.

Max looks up and flashes a crooked smile at the camera.

“Hey Max,” Nev coos but his voice is strained, “Whatchya doing.”

“About to ride some Schulman dick,” Max shudders and laughs, sitting back, “ _Fuck_ , you feel amazing...”

“Not too big?” The question is genuine concern and Max falls in love a little more.

“It’s great.”

“Didn’t answer my question.”

“Shut up,” Max adjusts himself and rolls his hips up and back slowly, testing the rhythm. Both alternatively gasp and groan and Max sets to ride some Schulman dick.

Nev keeps the camera as steady as possible, capturing the whole thing as best he can. Max is a natural in front and behind the camera; always looking drop-dead gorgeous and contemplative, which only makes him more handsome. The same is true now, with his head slightly down, heavy brow knitted, really concentrating on riding Nev as best he can. It’s difficult and different and weird but he finds a rhythm and Nev thrusts counterpoint so they synch and from there, it’s awesome. Just rolling together and gasping and crying out each other’s names.

Max sits up and starts bouncing in a new rhythm, hands barely ghosting over Nev’s lower stomach for balance, and Nev exchanges the handheld to Max so he can hold onto his undulating hips. Max grins and focuses the camera on Nev’s face, which keeps jumping out of frame from Max’s own rhythm. Nev is panting, fingers digging into Max’s hips and ass, concentrating on finding the right time to thrust. Max thinks it’s insanely adorable and makes the decision to place the camera on the bedside table, still focused on them, so he can meet Nev’s thrusts.

Max steadies his hands on either side of Nev’s head and braces himself on his knees to Nev can thrust in harsh, pointed motions, drawing synchronized gasps from them both. Max keeps watching Nev’s face, entranced by the colors radiating off his flushed cheeks and bright eyes. It occurs to him then that they might have–

“A-ah!” Max cries out at a pointed thrust and a warm, rough hand squeezing his cock. Suddenly the world contracts and he can no longer think, only feel and gasp and plead for Nev to give him more, touch him all over, make him come.

“Please!” Max gasps, half-collapsing on top of him and kissing him messily. Nev complies, rocking the two of them together until everything goes hot and bright and they’re both crying out and coming and shaking and holding on tight to each other. It feels like an eternity; wave after wave of pleasure until it fades and they’re gasping for air and settling into post-orgasmic bliss.

Max concentrates on breathing in Nev’s scent, finding it comforting and warm like a blanket from the drier on a cold, rainy day. Their legs are tangled hopelessly together, as are their arms, and Max finds himself not caring if he gets a dead arm from the weight of the two of them on top of it. All that matters is that Nev is with him, kissing him sleepily, and he feels happier than he’s been in months.

“I don’t want to be weird,” Max whispers between kisses, “But I kind of love you.”

“You too,” Nev whispers back, just as sleepy. Max quietly drifts off with this assurance, surrounded by Nev’s embrace. 


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning is not kind.

As soon as they open their eyes, roughly at the same time, they see the other’s face. They’re not cuddling, technically, but they might as well be. It takes a minute before either reacts, just staring at the other in bewilderment and confusion. Then the soreness sets in. Headaches become apparent, bright and throbbing right behind their eyes, and Max feels an unfamiliar ache where he should _never_ ache. He exhales sharply, starting to panic, and sits up. It doesn’t take long for them to realize what has happened but the memories come in bits and pieces, each one filling in blanks for the other.

“This is ridiculous, we had like one beer,” Nev groans quietly, rubbing his eyes. Max sighs, sitting against the headboard and staring at the wall. Nev sits up, cracks his neck, and starts searching for clothes.

“You wanna shower first?” Max offers, though his preference is to sit in the tub of the shower for about a week and gets all the sweat and (presumably) semen off of his body. Nev nods and stands, unsure if he should cover himself, “I mean we’ve seen enough of each other...”

“Yeah but I don’t really remember it,” Nev counters and then spies the handheld still perched on the bedside table. The battery is dead, having recorded the entire night. Max says he’ll charge it and put the footage on his personal laptop for safe-keeping.

“Or I can just delete it,” he watches for Nev’s reaction. It’s a shrug—a suspiciously flustered one at that.

“I mean... We might as well try to watch it. Separately,” it comes as an afterthought. Max flushes and looks away.

“... We’ll see. Go shower.”

“You wanna join me?”

Max looks up, alarmed by the proposition, but Nev is already gone. Fuck. This is land mine territory and they have no metal detectors.

“ _What?_ ” Max says aloud and takes out the SD card from his handheld. Might as well transfer the file while he’s waiting on Nev. The thought of joining him in the shower occurs to him but with as gross as he’s feeling, he can’t imagine standing in that shower, let alone trying to be sexy with Nev. Not right now.

“Jesus,” he rubs his face and pulls the file onto his laptop. It takes a minute or two to copy, seeing as the footage is 4 hours long, though Max is confident most of that was just them sleeping. Maybe he can splice that part out and speed it up, if only for curiosity’s sake. That kind of thing always interested him though part of him is still convinced he’ll see some spooky _Paranormal Activity_ shit if he does that.

The file completes its copying right when the noise of the shower stops. Max’s finger hovers over the touchpad, wanting to watch the .mov but terrified of what he’ll see. Nev appears behind him suddenly and Max shoves both hands into his lap.

“Done downloading?”

“Copying. Yeah. Can it wait until I shower too?”

“Totally. I mean, we don’t even have to watch it.”

“Right.”

They both know they’re going to.

Max quickly heads for the shower as soon as he can, leaving Nev to dress and hang out while he personally gets clean. He does end up sitting in the shower and contemplating the night previous for a good 10 minutes but it’s nothing to the week or so he wants to stay in there. Eventually, he exits and finds Nev watching Animal Planet and dressed in a hoodie and jeans. He looks so comfy. Max envies him. He crosses in front of him to grab clean boxer briefs and his clothes for the day, dressing on the other side of the room with his back to his roommate. Nev half-watches him from the corner of his eye.

Max is clothed and the two sit on their intended beds, watching _Too Cute_. It is just as advertised.

“You wanna watch it?” Nev glances at him quickly. Max doesn’t even see it.

“... Maybe.”

Within three minutes the two are once again in Nev’s bed and hunched together, watching the monitor of Max’s laptop. It’s all blurred images and sounds at first, but then they see Max, naked and straddling Nev’s lap, grinning. He looks delirious, voice hitching unevenly, and then the real pornography starts.

It’s awkward; not just from the content but Max’s strained and uneven rhythm, his hands slipping, his body lurching, is painful to watch. The shot goes on for way too long, leaving Max and Nev uncomfortable and embarrassed (though Max more so). Then it’s Nev’s turn when Max takes over control of the handheld, though the quality of footage drops dramatically. Everything is shaky and out of focus, rising and falling with how Max is supposedly bouncing in Nev’s lap. What little they can see of Nev is unflattering; he looks completely trashed. Nev grits his teeth while watching himself, furiously embarrassed by the sight. Max can only think of how he must’ve been moving to capture such horrible film.

Finally, Max sets the handheld aside and the two fall together, awkward rhythm intact, though it’s synchronized now. Max winces at how loud he is, literally begging Nev to make him come. Then it’s just uncoordinated thrusts and kissing and touching each other wherever they can and it’s almost painful to watch, but there’s something there behind all the fumbling and giggling. Max sees it in Nev’s wandering hands, gripping onto any part of Max he can, tender but possessive. Nev sees it in Max’s long kisses and clipped noises.

They both swallow nervously.

After another five or so minutes, Max comes first with an embarrassing whine that sounds too much like Nev’s name. Nev is close behind, brokenly gasping and holding on tight to Max. Long pause. Max is about to close the window when he hears it.

_I kind of love you_.

_You too._

There are mumbles after this but nothing of value. The two have fallen asleep cuddling. Max closes the window and his laptop. Neither he nor Nev say anything until the crew knocks and they’re out for another day of shooting.

\--

The day is a nightmare. Nev and Max are keeping their distance from each other and Antoinette and T Lights are... Boring. Max hates to think it but it’s boring when Catfish are legitimate and everything works out fine. He loves making real connections happen, of course, but he also knows good TV and this is not it. Worse yet is the fact he and Nev don’t have their usual chemistry so they can’t punch that up either.

Whatever, good for the kids, he supposes.

The producer calls a wrap and they head back to the hotel. Their flight is in a few hours. Max and Nev spend their time packing in silence until Max can’t take it and he stops Nev right as they’re about to leave their room.

“Look, uh,” it’s awkward. He purses his lips before continuing, “I think we were drugged.”

“What?”

“I grabbed a couple beers from the counter at the bar. I guess someone wanted to do ecstasy or something and put it in their beer.”

“You grabbed someone else’s drink??”

“I thought they were mine?? It made sense at the time.”

Nev sighs and runs his hands over his face. He doesn’t usually get frustrated, but Max understands. He fucked up. And got fucked. They both did. Nev has every right to be mad.

“Right, okay,” Nev finally says and looks right at him. Max’s throat goes dry for a second, “Whatever, you know? It happens.”

“This doesn’t just ‘happen.’”

“No but. Whatever, we can’t do anything about it. We got drugged and had really awesome sex,” Nev shrugs as if it’s the most casual thing in the world. Max stares, trying to breathe through the tightness in his chest.

“Really?”

Nev licks his lips and looks at the floor. He shrugs, “Well... Wasn’t it?”

“From what I can remember... Yeah?”

Nev grins and Max can’t help but share it. Nev’s enthusiasm is infectious, even in the worst of situations. It’s true now, truer still when Nev steps forward into Max’s personal bubble and even the hotel brand body wash can’t mask Nev’s natural warm smell. Max looks up and finds Nev’s grin, unwavering, and entirely directed at him. He feels important.

“Look, like, we’ve been friends forever,” Nev begins quietly and the grin turns into this private, fond smile Max has never seen before, “And, well, rumors being what they are... I mean...”

Max snorts and looks down for a second, “You wanna just... Do that, then?”

Nev shrugs and Max is acutely aware of how much of his life is consumed by this ridiculous man.

“Do you?”

Max can’t help but say yes. It explodes out of him with embarrassing sincerity but he does, truly, want to be able to come home after shooting and be able to focus on Nev. He wants his days consumed with the younger man, to find his apartment filled with Nev’s artsy, kitschy, “inspirational” decor. He wants to hold him close at night and tell him exactly how much he means to him, want to kiss the smile off his face and hold his hand in the car, fuck if the cameras can see. He wants everything they’ve always had but louder, brighter, more intensely than it’s ever been.

It feels like relief when Nev grins and kisses him against the wall, his hands finding their place on Max’s hips and Max’s hands exploring anywhere he can touch. It feels like he’s been holding so much in for so long until now, when they kiss and snicker because they’re too giddy to hold it inside. It feels like everything is falling into place and Max shivers and can’t hold back a broken little whimper against Nev’s mouth. Everything is bright, and hot, and he wonders if he’s still got some of that ecstasy in his system. Nev breaks the kiss and mouths at Max’s ear while Max clings tight and hides his face.

“We have to go to the airport,” Nev reminds him. He knows Max is getting overwhelmed already and as much as he wants to stay and take care of him, kiss every inch of him and leave him breathless, they can’t. Not now.

“I know,” Max mumbles and pulls on Nev’s shirt. They stay like that for a moment before Max exhales a shaky laugh, “No time for a handjob?”

Nev cracks up and just holds him close and Max grins into his shoulder. It feels good.

“I’ll make it up to you later,” Nev promises as they pull apart, foreheads touching briefly. Max smiles and nods.

“You better.”

 

 End.


End file.
